we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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