She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
