He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
