apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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