She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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