I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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