My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
