bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
