Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
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