i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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