you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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