so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
3pm strippers are depressing
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
