I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
So much rum. So many feels.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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