I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize