Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
i think i scared a bird with my dick
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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