I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
