I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
