I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
