but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
