): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
