whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
