She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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