But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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