just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
