Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
