Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
