question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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