Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
