I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i believe in u and ur pee
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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