Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
