lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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