about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
