Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
