Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize
