just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
