just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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