Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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