it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
