just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
