He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize