got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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