when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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