He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
