You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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