i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
one might say we're banned from that church
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
