you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize
