Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Randomize
