You made me cry and you don't even care
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
