At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Did I show you my penis last night?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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