remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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